Day 10

Well at least these numbered days for blog headings takes away the need to think up some quirky (more like cheesy) heading for each blog post! I can easily waffle off pages and pages of a lot to do about very little but thinking of the name gets me stumped. Like naming a sauce or a business idea or a new dog or whatever. I'll tell you all about it bit don't ask me what it's called!

Day 10 and still I've not had a drink. Not much else to say on the matter today.

I will tell you about my lunch though - rather messy toasted sandwiches on brown bread with tuna, cream cheese, mayo, salt and some of the habanero sauce I made in December, which is nice and mature and rather strong. It's a delicious sandwich!

So both of my sauces now have labels designed and are being printed and shipped to the company's offices in Cape Town in the next day or two. By the weekend I'll have a stack of sauces bottled and ready to sell. Can't wait to have an actual tangible stock of products ready for purchase by actual paying customers. And this will be the start of many! Thanks to that break I mentioned in yesterday's post!

The website is also coming along, albeit slowly, it's taking shape and shouldn't take too long to go live. I'm building it on Wordpress using the Woothemes eCommerce infrastructure. The cooler themes and extensions are expensive so I'm limited to the free version of the software which is quite limited so it's a lot of time and work to get it doing what I need.  I don't get much opportunity to work on it, and sometimes the odd moment I do get in peace on my computer at home gets hijacked by a family member the moment I get up off my chair. Last night it happened again and I was furious, not just because my limited time was stolen, but because I was treated as if the work that I need to do in my time on my equipment is unimportant and inconsequential compared to whatever anybody else needs to do! I'm trying to build a business, with very little knowledge or support and zero capital to outsource things like finances, marketing, building websites etc, so each development day lost is one day further away that an income can be generated. But who cares what I think! Those are the blood-boiling moments that I would usually go and drink, especially when being viciously insulted for getting upset, and I feel my resolve is deliberately being tested to see how far my limits stretch before breaking! But I will not! I will not allow more time to be wasted being drunk and unproductive even if my precious productive time is taken by other means!

On another note, this morning I came up with another business idea, off-shooting from my sauces, it's relatively simple in concept and once my business is going will generate additional revenue through relatively little effort. BUT, I think this is relatively unique in this industry and quite a risky idea to be stolen and jeopardized, so until such time as it's been set up and tested I will absolutely not give any clues as to what this idea is! It could flop into oblivion or it could make me stupidly wealthy... time will tell, but my limited marketing skills will be tested!

Regarding my day job, I'm not enjoying it these days. I'm just bored and unstimulated and therefore thanks to my ADD constantly distracted with delusions of grand adventures and crazy ideas of ways to make money by other means that don't involve a clockwatched job working for a herd of obnoxious demeaning bosses for a heavily taxed meager salary that just gets less and less in relation to inflation and having to risk my life 10 times a week in traffic from hell to get to my dreary old office in this most hideous of industrial environments to perform the repetitive monotonous tasks of the job that hacks away constantly at the dwindling time that's been allocated to my existence in this bodily form on this earth. That and I don't want to live in the city anymore!

I'm so desperately hungry for change and some excitement and new challenges with decent potential rewards, both financial and mental well-being. I don't want to be stuck in this rut anymore, having to make that depressing infuriating journey through many of the planets worst fucktards to this boring job in this ugly place, while constantly being in a gradually deepening financial pit that makes any form of progress impossible! I've had enough being so poor that just being poor makes me even more poor, I've had enough of struggling to get from one payday to the next and going through the same monthly depression that gets deeper and deeper as the month progresses.

At the moment I've even lost my mojo for running, which scares me because I love the running and I love being addicted to running but right now that craving to run is just dulled.

The time is coming for big changes, and that time needs to be soon before this dreadful hole of expanding blackness consumes my soul beyond the point of return! Life as it is now, my life, cannot continue on the bumpy lonely thorn-bush lined downhill path it's going now.

In the next few days I need to think about a timeline of targets, including at which point my alternative incomes generate enough funds consistently to leave this soul-sucking day job to work for myself full time without risking losing my home!

There's more to life, more to me, than what I am now. This can't be how it ends for me!


Fuck that! Time to start climbing upwards...

But for now, my half-hour lunch break is over, back to the coalface...