Don't read this! Ok!

Right now I want so much just to be able to rant! I feel like shit and I'm grumpy as fuck and the only people who will listen are a very small group of my "friends" on my social media spaces, like this blog! I used to use facebook for my rants but apparently most people don't wanna know, apparently I've offended a lot of people, I've heard rumors that many people have unfollowed me, eg. my mom told me recently that my extended family discuss my online "behaviour" at family gatherings like Christmas, and not in a positive way. It seems the superficial appearances are far more important than real people. Although I do miss being part of a bigger family I'm also fine without them, I don't need or want to be judged for not conforming to the norm and have for years now distanced myself and my loved ones from that sort of soul corrosion. You get beaten off enough times you back off! I'm still not quite sure where I landed up being the family black sheep, it was never meant and intentions were always good and honest, but I suppose in every big family somebody needs to bear that dark title and I believe I wear that crown with many thorns.

So this is already getting to the level of getting me right back down deep in the shit of offending people, again not because I want to but because I'm fucking miserable right now and when I'm miserable it pisses people off! I had minor surgery yesterday which has been incredibly painful all day today, I had a shyte day at work, I've just spent my evening trying to design and create simple labels using simple Word templates matching the standard stationery sheets of expensive labels and it's not working and with all the painkillers in my system right now I'm just not fucking happy at the moment! My great ambition to make and sell awesome professionally presented chili sauces is just not going to plan! The sauces are made and bottled, but sitting in boxes in the garage, useless, because I cannot create simple fucking labels for them!

And this hole in my arm is burning like hell despite the whiskey and painkillers!

Why the fuck does it have to be so god damned impossible to make progress! I hate this drag of the menial unappreciated degrading day job that just drags one deeper into a recession as inflation drowns one in waves past the annual basic pay rise while the "correctly" connected soar to financial wealth! Just a small fucking break would be nice. Like labels that print correctly on a home printer so one can try sell a few simple sauces! It's not asking much!

So yeah, rant is feeling good, I still have this angry scowl etched on my face, I can feel it and I hate feeling this way but ranting in writing is in some fucked up way therapeutic!

To my regular, more conservative readers, please forgive my bad language, and don't abandon me as most of my family have. You know I've been trying to tone down my personality both here and on facebook. Sometimes it's just not easy keeping it all bottled! Let alone labelled! Haha see there's still the joker throwing a bone in...

Goodnight!